Don’t be ~
I apologize for being absent for so long; I have been working on a big project.
But, can we talk about something?
The other day I overheard a gentlemen tell a friend, “Don’t be embarrassed” ~ and immediately thought “don’t tell them how to feel.” I had such a strong internal reaction.
Have you ever been told how you should or should not be? Or how you should feel or not feel?
“Don’t be scared” ~
“Don’t cry” ~
“Don’t be sad” ~
Have you ever found yourself in the position to tell someone how to feel or not feel?
Maybe the better question is, “Why am I struggling with them being embarrassed?” Do I feel the need to make it better? Or, is it uncomfortable for me?
Can we change the conversation?
Can we shift into validating feelings rather than trying to take them away? “I”m sorry that you are feeling embarrassed.” There is so much freedom is that.
Validation can be such a game-changer; it can shift a mood, change a conversation. It can create a new closeness with a spouse.
Or, it can give you the freedom to be honest with yourself without trying to stuff feelings.